Dude, Cancer sucks. I will prove it to you.

Friday, August 19, 2011

8-18-11

You know, I have found that I am a very different writer depending on the time of day that I decide to write.  In the morning, I am not very polished and my filters that make me sound less insane are not quite up and running yet.  Most of my posts that leave you aksing yourself, “What is he on, and can I have some?” are morning writings.

In the afternoon and early evening, I can almost pass for a normal person (despite the fact that we all know better).  I do spell checks, I tend to engage in less parenthetical awesomeness, and sometimes I even proof read what I just wrote.

Late at night I find that I am more introspective, and have less humor than normal.  This is where I find myself tonight.  Another night with sleep difficulties.  More thoughts about the unknown future.  Some people have described stress as a big heavy weight that sits on them and seems to get heavier and heavier as time goes on.  In my experience, stress is like a cold wind.  When it is blowing lightly, you know it is there but it is not all that unpleasant.  In fact, on hot days a cold breeze helps your day be more enjoyable.  But that cold breeze can quickly turn into a biting cold wind.  Now you know that you can take it, and that it will not kill you, but the longer that wind assaults you, the more you notice how awful it makes you feel.  It makes your hands hurt.  It stings your ears.  It seems to somehow wind its way through the protective layer of clothes that you are wearing until it gets into your bones.  It envelopes you to the point that all of your attention is focused on that infernal wind.  Again you know that it will not kill you, and will not even keep you from doing what you want.  But it really sucks, and keeps you from enjoying your day to the fullest extent possible.  Tonight the wind is blowing.

Cole is doing well.  He has almost completed his first week of radiation, and thus far has had no side effects that I have seen.  Radiation thus far has been very anti-climactic.  He does not glow in the dark, and has not grown a third eyeball.  He is in good spirits and is having fun helping Elisa get her class ready for the start of school.

Starting next week I will be on FMLA and will only be working 2 days per week until Cole can go back to school.  He has an appointment in early November to check his T-Cells, but we won’t know the results for a couple of weeks after that.  I am hoping that it will not affect our Disney World trip.  I will keep you posted, but for now please raise your glasses and toast Cole, media mogul.

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