I have developed this kind of strange fear. While I am always concerned about Cole’s cancer, I find that I am not really afraid of it right now. Maybe that is because he is doing so well, I don’t know. What I am terrified of is that Cole will get through all of this cancer stuff and as soon as the Dr says that he is cured, he will get hit by a bus, or an airplane will fall on him, or he will be abducted by aliens. Now as a parent you always have that fear that something might happen to your kids, but it seems that my sense of fear has been heightened lately. Very strange.
This evening we went to Cole’s open house for his kindergarten class. The teacher was very happy to see him. Cole was a little shy at first, but soon opened up and was chatting away with her. I was glad to see that the other kids remembered him by sight alone, and all seemed very genuinely happy to see him.
Part of the open house event was that they turned the multi purpose room into an art gallery to display all of the art the kids had been doing. Now this was not just Cole’s class, it was for the whole school. The organizers did an amazing job. At one point we were in the gallery and Cole was standing three of his friends. The moms were taking pictures (as moms do, especially at the end of the school year), and for about 30 seconds we were not the family dealing with cancer, Cole did not have cancer. He was just a kid standing with his friends. So far I have been pretty good about holding it together during this difficult time, but those 30 seconds almost crushed me. You see the problem was that those 30 seconds ended, and Cole does have cancer, and we have to deal with it every second of every day.
That being said, we will keep fighting the good fight, and while we do please raise your glass and toast Cole, the next Food Network Star.