Dude, Cancer sucks. I will prove it to you.

Sunday, February 27, 2011

2-26-11 Peloncito

Yes the hair loss has begun.  It started yesterday.  Cole first started finding hairs on the dining room table as we were eating dinner.  He thought they were Elisa's, but they were obviously not.  Now we knew that this was going to start happening around this time, but I had been delaying telling Cole about it.  The reason for this is twofold.  First every time I have to tell him something that is taking a piece of his childhood away, or takes another piece of control over his own life from him, it makes me sick.  Second is that I wanted him to have as many normal days as possible, especially in light of the unplanned hospital stay earlier this week before dropping another shitty bombshell on him.

Of course once we told him, he accepted it as he has accepted everything else.  He said, "ok" and then went about with the rest of his dinner.  We did talk more about it, and gave him some choices of what to do.  We said that we can leave it alone, we can shave it now (Elisa's choice), or we can do something crazy like shave his name in his head (my choice).  He has, so far, decided to to do nothing.  So far the hair loss is not extreme so it is only a minor annoyance.  I am sure that once it becomes more annoying and noticeable, he will choose to have it shaved.  Hopefully he will let me shave some designs in his head. 

On another note, we went to UCSF yesterday to meet with the doctors there regarding the stem cell collection and transfusion that is part of the treatment.  The meeting went well and on 3/17, Cole will be back up there for the process of collecting his stem cells.  It seems like the process is not overly sucky, but it will not be a super fun time for anyone.  They have to sedate him (but not with general ), and put an IV line into his leg.  The collection will take all day, and possibly the next day as well. 

I had an interesting day today.  Cole was in great spirits and seems to really have taken to his high fat, high protein eat anything and everything crappy for you that we can eat.  Of course, and purely out of fatherly affection and to show solidarity, I have been eating the same stuff.  Cole's best bud, Noah, came over today and they had a great time playing, and even went outside to ride bikes and scooters.  While that was great, I took our car into the shop and found that it needs break pad and new rotors.  Yea for me.

So Elisa and I were watching Love Actually this evening.  She went to bed before it ended, and I found myself watching the end.  I have this sickness whereby any movie that I am watching, I have to watch the end.  It doesn't matter if I like it or not, I have to watch it through.  For those of you who haven't seen the movie, there is one character who is a 10ish year old boy who is madly in love with a girl in his class (who happens to be a world class singer, but that is beside the point, and I am sure he just loves her for her bad teeth....it is set in England after all).  As I watched this cute little romance play out (which concluded in an awesome pre 9/11 run through the airport with the cops hot on the boy's heels as he tried to catch his love before she flew away), I suddenly was hit with the thought that there is a chance that Cole may never get the chance to make a complete fool of himself in order to impress the girl of his dreams.  That means he may never fall in love.  He may never feel that feeling that I have every time I see Elisa.  That thought just killed me.  It really pisses me off that I am getting to the point where I can't remember not feeling like someone has kicked me in the nuts every single day, and I am getting tired of it. 

That being said; however, I ask that you please raise your glasses and toast Cole, distiller of fine spirits.

No comments:

Post a Comment